I'm tired of the life I'm living. I'm tired of waking up every single day and not feeling excited about what's to come. I'm tired of waking up every day and feeling like I don't have a purpose.

So, I'm giving myself a purpose. There is a program called Cross Cultural Solutions (CCS). And I'm going to do it. Not this summer, I need to raise the money first, but next summer absolutely. I want to go to either Ghana or Cape Town in Africa or New Delhi in India. The educational systems needs improvement (teaching teachers how to teach, helping in HIV and AIDS, working in the schools with young children, working to empower women, etc).

Please just pray for me. Pray that I have the fight to make this work. I've got to do something with my life, something worthwhile. Something that will benefit someone other than ME. I feel like such a selfish person, most of what I do is just for me. And I'm done being like that. Pray that I can turn someone's life around.

Nothing like coming home to make me realize what I really miss in my life.

I miss music. I miss playing. I miss the feeling that you get when you get really into a piece and your heart starts racing and your adrenaline starts going and you just feel like you are part of the music you are creating. I miss that feeling so much. It was liberating.

There's something about music that just takes me out of the physical world that I'm in and makes my heart feel happy. I miss that feeling.

Alfred Reed's Russian Christmas
Part 1 and Part 2

Easily my favorite piece ever.

Every Wednesday night, my roommates and I watch Law and Order: Special Victims Unit. I used to watch it, years ago. I never really followed the show. Sometimes I would have to turn the t.v. off because of how graphic the episodes were, but I never really paid attention anyway. But, now we watch it every Wednesday. Every episode is based off of a real occurence in the United States or in the world.

I can not get over how many sick and horrible people there are in the world. There are horrific things happening to innocent people all over the world. What are we going to do to stop it? What are we DOING to stop it?